Babies

I love babies. I'd have a dozen more if someone would let me. But alas, I am resigned to the three hoodlums entrusted to me and growing beyond my control and beyond my desire. It seems they will no longer be my little "babies" and the treasures I packed home with me some 16, 14, and 12 years ago. Ahhhhh, to hold them again in my arms without getting heaved to the ground in some sort of mixed martial arts combat. "I can kick your butt, Dad!" Indeed. They can kick my butt. Where does the time go -- as well as the more simple moments that came with a pacifier and a teddy bear?

When a baby is a baby it seems we are a more gentle and accepting people. There are not too many expectations placed on babies. We expect that they will soil themselves, and drool, and cry through the night. We expect it, and we accept it. We don't think little of babies for being little. But dammit. If you grow up you better live up, too. We expect it, and we will not accept it if you don't cut it.

When a child is one and learns to walk we applaud him for falling down. Gravity takes its course and we cheer. But did you see him for a moment? Did you see him right before he fell? Why, he might be a great athlete one day! But come 5, or 6, or 7, if he is not running as fast as the other kids, or racking up goals in kindergarten soccer then there is a temptation to be disappointed, isn't there. He needs to try harder.

When a child is two and says his first words we can't help but think he is faster than other children his age. Never mind complete sentences. We put the best construction on everything he says. We listen intently. We fill in the blanks. We gently interpret and correct what he says. "oh, he didn't mean to say that," we defend. But should he get a masters degree, or a doctorate, should he be a preacher, or a lawyer, or someone else who speaks for a living, then listen to the pundits filett your little darling. Do you ever wonder if Barack Obama or John McCain have mothers? I wonder what they think while they undermine each other?

Wouldn't it be great if we never grew up and into the harsh expectations of others? Wouldn't it be great if we could live forever in the sweet tranquility of unconditional mercy? Wouldn't it be great if we could be someone's baby just for a day, held fast and close in someone's arm? Better that than to have someone kick your butt.

Here is a mountain man challenge: Look at people today and envision them someone else's child. Think how much you would accept them if your expectations were not too lofty and high. Oh, this is not to say we do not encourage poeple and help them to do their best. It is to say that if they should fall just a little short, or even a long way short, you treat them no differently than you would a one year old falling on his seat, or a two year old who can't quite talk right. Speak well of people. Be very kind, very generous, very gracious. Forgive people today. Let go of differences. Listen. And always have three questions of interest for someone else. That's a begining anyway. And if we keep at it we may even find ourselves at the top.

Thank you for carrying me today. I love you very much. Jeff